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Don’t Give Up on Love

One thing 2017 taught me was this:

Don’t give up on love.

2017 was a hard year. A bewildering year. It was a year when chaos took the reins.

And chaos, when linked to evil, is a terrifying thing.

“Give us the corrosive systems we know and understand!” many of us cried. “Give us back evil that is neutral. Evil that counts numbers. Evil that obeys the rule of law.”

That’s not what we got in 2017. Instead, we got systems that cracked and groaned in the midst of a new maelstrom. We got torches marching in the streets, and gunning people down. We got The Joker, jeering and japing from a big white plantation house.

We got more murder. More oppression.

We got terror for many, and comfort for a decreasing few.

But in 2017? We did not give up on love.

In 2017? We dug deep into our hearts and figured out what was important to us.

In 2017? We retreated, some of us, sure. But we also showed up, side by side, to face jack boots or offer food to our hungry or grieving neighbors.

In 2017? We kissed. We laughed. We danced when we could. We painted pictures and wheeled our ‘chairs into the rain. We baked cookies, fragrant with cinnamon. We crunched our teeth into apples, and let the juice burst in our mouths.

In 2017, every time I felt despair, or an anger so great it threatened to engulf me, I remembered the force of love.

And I looked around…and saw that you did, too. And I loved you for that.

In 2017? I loved you fiercely. And I felt every single one of you who loved each other back.

“An army of lovers shall not fail,” the poet said.

In 2018? In 2020? In 2105? Let us please keep falling back in love.

It is the only force strong enough to prevail.

December 31, 2017

________

(The poet is Rita Mae Brown. That is the final line of “Sappho’s Reply.”)

This is reader funded writing. I thank all of my Patreon supporters for making it possible for me to provide one free essay and short story every month. Most of this writing would not exist without these people. They all rock.

Want to join my Patreon crew? You get advance copies of essays and stories before they hit the web, plus a chance for free books once or so a year. 

One thousand blessings to supporters Anon, Bear, Doneby, Dayle, Devotaj, Will, Brooks, Law Nerd, Michelle, Gwynne, Mark, Merri Ann, Meagan, Veronica, Shira, Allyson, Jocelyne, Michael, Dawn, Joanna, Lia, Rachel, Kiya, Corinne, Evodjie, Angela, Zann, Daniel, Luna, Christopher, Sarah, Amerwitch, Tamara, Elizabeth, J. Anthony, Sea Serpent, Jen, David, Emilie, Jennifer, Elliot, Ellen, a phoenix, Jersey Meg, Tony, Sean, Sherry, Christopher, Stephanie, Lira, Ariana, Tamara, Karen, Morgaine, Sarah, Rachel, Jenny, Joanna, R.M., Ember, San, Miriam, Leslie, Sharon, Mary Anne, Joanna, Tony, Angela, Constance, Stone, Omorka, Unwoman, Shemandoah, Sarah, Rain, Cid, Alley, Mica, Christine, Vyviane, Katie, Emilie, Louise, Victoria, Greg, Ealasaid, Jennifer, Louise, Rose, Starr, Sinead, Lyssa, Aeptha, Cara, Crystal, Angela, Misha, Eridanus, Cheryl, Lori, Soli, Peter, Angela, Ambariel, Sonia, Jennifer, Ruth, Miranda, Jeremy, Jonah, Michelle, Jenny, Jen, Mir, Ruth, Emilie, Jonathan, Kate, Roger and Nancy.

 

Feeding the Gods of Hope


“We have all known the long loneliness and we have learned that the only solution is love and that love comes with community.” – Dorothy Day

We stagger toward the longest night, some of us shivering, the blare of false cheer in our ears and debt lining our pockets.

These are, indeed, another round of “the worst of times.”

And yet…

In the midst of gloom shine pinpricks of colored light. And even hidden behind clouds, the sun still eclipses the earth by day, offering the promise that –rejoice!– something new is on its way.

Everything cycles: The earth rotates on its axis. The tide shushes in and out again. The moon appears to wax and wane, so steady in the sky.

I look out my window (You see, I have a home. It’s warm and dry. I’m blessed.) at a gray sky framing bare maple branches. In the distance, the dark green needles of pine tower above the black snakes of telephone wires.

Crows call to one another, and fat squirrels chase nuts and seeds, tails twitching in cold air.

And I remember…

There are people. And people share stories. They make music and art. They bake bread, and brew whiskey.

People do other things, too.

People speak truth to power.

People intervene.

People band together to say: Enough! We’re through!

Plus: Babies laugh. A lot.

And people feed one another.

And we keep finding ways to help. And to create. And to listen. And to understand.

There is a way out of this. There always has been. The way out of despair is through the loving care and fiery strength of those who insist on reaching out a hand.

We can always choose to remember: even in the midst of anger, despair, and defeat, there can be –and will be– strength and joy. Perhaps not all the time, but that’s okay.

Hope exists where we make it.

Moloch eats his own.

We are feeding different Gods.

We are feeding the Goddesses of justice.

The Gods of love and hope.

The Spirits of water, earth, and sky.

We will not be put down.

Portland, OR December, 2017

This is reader funded writing. I thank all of my Patreon supporters for making it possible for me to provide one free essay and short story every month. Most of this writing would not exist without these people. They all rock.

Want to join my Patreon crew? You get advance copies of essays and stories before they hit the web, plus a chance for free books once or so a year. 

One thousand blessings to supporters Bear, Doneby, Dayle, Devotaj, Will, Brooks, Law Nerd, Michelle, Gwynne, Mark, Merri Ann, Meagan, Veronica, Shira, Allyson, Jocelyne, Michael, Dawn, Joanna, Lia, Rachel, Kiya, Corinne, Evodjie, Angela, Zann, Daniel, Luna, Christopher, Sarah, Amerwitch, Tamara, Elizabeth, J. Anthony, Sea Serpent, Jen, David, Emilie, Jennifer, Elliot, Ellen, a phoenix, Jersey Meg, Tony, Sean, Sherry, Christopher, Stephanie, Lira, Ariana, Tamara, Karen, Morgaine, Sarah, Rachel, Jenny, Joanna, R.M., Ember, San, Miriam, Leslie, Sharon, Mary Anne, Joanna, Tony, Angela, Constance, Stone, Omorka, Unwoman, Shemandoah, Sarah, Rain, Cid, Alley, Mica, Christine, Vyviane, Katie, Emilie, Louise, Victoria, Greg, Ealasaid, Jennifer, Louise, Rose, Starr, Sinead, Lyssa, Aeptha, Cara, Crystal, Angela, Misha, Eridanus, Cheryl, Lori, Soli, Peter, Angela, Ambariel, Sonia, Jennifer, Ruth, Miranda, Jeremy, Jonah, Michelle, Jenny, Jen, Mir, Ruth, Emilie, Jonathan, Kate, Roger and Nancy.

 

Tear it Down: Assault, Violence, & Healing in Empire


It’s been a rough and traumatic few weeks, following a rough and traumatic year, following a rough and traumatic several decades, or hundreds of years.

It all depends upon your perspective.

***

You think it can be fixed. Amended. Reformed.

It can’t.

***

Rape. Harassment. Assault. Murder. Degradation. Trauma. Shame.

***

There is nothing about our current systems that is not working exactly the way it is meant to.

These systems are meant to punish the poor.

These systems are meant to exploit women and female presenting people.

These systems are designed to shame non-alpha men and male presenting people.

These systems are designed to prey upon the weak and to reinforce their weakness at every turn.

These systems are designed to put psychopaths and abusers in positions where they have power over others.

These systems are designed to support constant predation, violence, and the reign of fear.

These systems are designed to kill.

***

When a country’s economy is largely set up to serve the military and the ultra-wealthy, how can we not expect that it would filter down into mass shootings, the murder of women and femmes, the constant killing of Black, brown, and Native citizens by police, the torture of children, the rape of janitors working the night shift, and the crushing of the working class?

Predators run this world. We praise and reward them for it. Every single system is set up to show predators how much we care. About them.

These systems will not change. These systems cannot and will not be reformed.

These systems must be toppled to the ground by the very people whom they have preyed upon. These systems must be broken by our refusal to go along. To cover up. To feel ashamed. To wish that we were wealthy and powerful and gleaming with the sleekness only brought about by living off the suffering of others.

******

“Kevin Spacey and his brother were abused,” they said.

I have no doubt that this is true. And you know what else? I’ve also been abused. So have too many of my friends to begin counting, and we do our utmost best to not abuse others.

“Dylann Roof will get the death penalty,” it has been reported. He killed, so he should be killed?

I will never trust the state to do anything other than kill, and I will never trust that the state will mete out anything approaching justice.

“We demand justice,” others have said.

But what does justice look like within these systems? Does prison offer justice? Does economic ruin offer justice? Does public humiliation offer justice? Does death offer justice?

No. All these things offer is revenge, and revenge is not enough. Revenge does not bring balance. Revenge does not restore harmony. Revenge does not offer healing.

Revenge is empty, promising much, and delivering almost nothing.

We currently have no justice systems in place.

We have no systems in place that offer healing.

We have no systems that actually keep communities healthy, safe, and thriving.

All we have are ashes, flecked with gold.

*****

We barely even have systems of accountability, let alone, justice.

The sickness we live with is so endemic and deeply rooted, it can be difficult to find a different way. It is difficult to even think on it, let alone imagine it.

But that different way already exists.

It is called Sankofa.

It is called Ho’o pono-pono.

It is called Tikkun Olam

It is called Restorative Justice. Healing. Repair.

We see people banding together, enacting these restorative methods. These people try to feed one another, and help one another heal, and cultivate joy – all in the midst of the crushing systems that make all of these processes as difficult as possible.

And then we are surprised and saddened when these efforts “fail.”

But they do not fail. They are crushed. Temporarily.

Because the systems in place are designed to crush any opposition. And because, regardless, people always find a way to love again.

The dandelion will always find a way to crack the concrete smothering its roots.

****

The police cannot be reformed.

Prisons cannot be reformed.

The military will not keep us safe.

These systems offer only more abuse, harm, and degradation.

Prisons, courts, and policing will never offer justice.

Big business? The rewarding of predators?

That cannot be reformed, or fixed. The blows cannot be softened.

***

So what do we do?

We start over. Think about it. Imagine what is possible.

We free all but the most violent prisoners (we’ll deal with them later, once we have better systems in place). We offer a safety net. We offer housing, education, health care, and a basic income. We offer mental health resources. We offer a chance to heal and make amends.

We set up systems of restorative justice, where people are trained to not simply resolve conflicts, but heal the damages that conflict has caused.

We train ourselves toward different ways of power.

We train ourselves to value things other than money and fame.

We insist that caring for one another is important.

We muster our will and look to indigenous leadership and Black wisdom, and to other sources that offer real solutions.

We say, “We’ve fucked up, badly. This whole society is a fucking mess.” And then we make what amends we can, and white and/or middle and/or upper-class people shut up and do what the poor, and the indigenous, and Black, and trans, and disabled people have been shouting at us to do for hundreds of years:

We build a society based on health and well-being instead of punishment and greed. We build a society based on restoration of harmony. We remember what it feels like to be whole.

We abolish – firmly – all of the systems that only serve to oppress and terrorize the most vulnerable among us.

We begin the very real work planning the society we want to build. Not as a utopia. Not as pie-in-the-sky. As the reality we aim to live in.

Prisons and courts and bombs and drones and the stockpiling money built on slave labor will not save us. Only love will.

***

Empire is already crumbling under its own weight.

You think it can be fixed. Amended. Reformed.

It can’t. Tear it down. Now is our chance.

Then, if we have the collective will…we can build something new.

____________________________________________________

Resources:

Sankofa Council of Nashville, Simple Booklet on Restorative Justice 

Dr. Joy DeGruy: Be the Healing

Michelle Alexander: The New Jim Crow

Field Marshall Tur-Ha Ak of Community Ready Corps: On Primary and Secondary Predators

And on The Plight of the Powerless, and organizing while living under oppression.

Definitions:

This is reader funded writing. I thank all of my Patreon supporters for making it possible for me to provide one free essay and short story every month. Most of this writing would not exist without these people. They all rock.

Want to join my Patreon crew? You get advance copies of essays and stories before they hit the web, plus a chance for free books once or so a year. 

One thousand blessings to supporters Dayle, Devotaj, Will, Brooks, Law Nerd, Michelle, Gwynne, Mark, Merri Ann, Meagan, Veronica, Shira, Allyson, Jocelyne, Michael, Dawn, Joanna, Lia, Rachel, Kiya, Corinne, Evodjie, Angela, Zann, Daniel, Luna, Christopher, Sarah, Amerwitch, Tamara, Elizabeth, J. Anthony, Sea Serpent, Jen, David, Emilie, Jennifer, Elliot, Ellen, a phoenix, Jersey Meg, Tony, Sean, Sherry, Christopher, Stephanie, Lira, Ariana, Tamara, Karen, Morgaine, Sarah, Rachel, Jenny, Joanna, R.M., Ember, San, Miriam, Leslie, Sharon, Mary Anne, Joanna, Tony, Angela, Constance, Stone, Omorka, Unwoman, Shemandoah, Sarah, Rain, Cid, Alley, Mica, Christine, Vyviane, Katie, Emilie, Louise, Victoria, Greg, Ealasaid, Jennifer, Louise, Rose, Starr, Sinead, Lyssa, Aeptha, Cara, Crystal, Angela, Misha, Eridanus, Cheryl, Lori, Soli, Peter, Angela, Ambariel, Sonia, Jennifer, Ruth, Miranda, Jeremy, Jonah, Michelle, Jenny, Jen, Mir, Ruth, Emilie, Jonathan, Kate, Roger and Nancy.

 
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