You have something to offer the world. We all do.
In the midst of other visions and information, a message came through for my client; it is time to learn to trust yourself. Over the course of the call, the story came out, one quite familiar, as I’ve heard it time and time again. I’ve heard this story many times over the years:
“I can’t step forward. I can’t be bright. If someone sees how I really am, they won’t love me. People only see the good things, not the ways in which I’ve failed, or carry wounds, or am not quite good enough…” In other words: “I am an impostor. I fear being unmasked.”
And then this: “I long to be seen, to be known. But I feel too afraid.”
Sometimes we think we don’t know enough. Don’t have the qualifications. Or that we have some dirty secret that disqualifies us from love and esteem.
Sometimes we are hiding from ourselves, and from community.
Someone needs your help. Your expertise. Your experience. Your presence.
Are you willing to step forward, and take your rightful place?
A woman came up to me as I was eating my soup in a patch of sunlight in the soup kitchen yard. She was dope sick. Tired of being on heroin. Tired of being hated. Tired of her son having his life together when she didn’t. She was tired of being afraid. I asked another volunteer if General Hospital had a methadone program. Yes, they did. Then he pointed out another guest, looking at donated books under the overhang. “You should talk to her.”
The person he pointed out was skinny, missing some teeth, clean and neatly dressed. Something has gone wrong with her legs and feet so she always looks like she is about to dance en pointe. As a result, she wears no shoes, just layers of thick socks. For people like you and me? We are likely to glance at her and look away. In this case? She was the right one to call upon. The expert.
This person whom many of us would pass over was someone with experience. Someone who knew the ins and outs of the system, having kicked heroin herself. I talked with her. Made sure the woman in need also talked with her, after she got some food down.
Lacking experience – and surely having no expertise – what I had that day was presence and the ability to ask the right questions…and to clean her vomit up later when it became needed.
Sometimes we need to ask for help.
Sometimes we need to know what we can offer: knowledge, or a shoulder, an ear, or simple presence in the face of pain.
Sometimes we need to stop hiding from the truth about ourselves…
We do know. We know a lot.
We all have skills and talents that we’ve trained ourselves toward.
Sometimes we don’t feel we have expertise, but we do have experience to offer.
Sometimes we don’t have experience, but we can offer presence.
Sometimes that last is just enough. All that is required.
What are you an expert in, however large or small?
What experiences have you had, that have shaped your knowing?
When can you offer simple presence to another, or some small kindness?
Are you are hiding in plain site, in the center of the circle, voice loud, arms outstretched? Are you are hiding in the corner, on the edges, quiet as a caterpillar waiting for a change?
We find it in the face of love.
Note: though I did have this conversation with a soul reading client recently, I've had similar with many other people in the past. This is therefore drawn from several conversations, and quoting no one in particular.